Back from the Dead, Perhaps?

I haven't updated this thing in five months. I've always been making little excuses. The list, lately:

1) I'm in a weird relationship that occasionally messes with my head, and I have a habit of only running off at the mouth (or keyboard) when I'm mad at things, and fixing to say stuff I don't mean.

2) I'm in a weird relationship that occasionally makes me gush uncontrollably, and I know how annoying it is to read fluffy blog posts.

3) A lot of times, I've got work-related stuff running through my head, and there are myriad reasons why I shouldn't (read: seriously can't) talk about it.

4) When I'm honest with myself on paper, so to speak, it becomes harder to hide from my problems / failures.

5) Sometimes I get lazy, discouraged, bitter, tired, or all sorts of nasty things that I don't like constantly giving voice to.

That's why I haven't updated in a while. So, I'll summarize the time that's passed, for the few people who may still subscribe to this. Yes, I'm in a relationship, that happened entirely by accident, which is why it's weird. I've turned 21. I've burned out on school yet again, and I'm (of course) completely uncertain where my life's going.

I'm also reconnecting with my adolescent fascination with Linkin Park.

I'm becoming increasingly antisocial as I get older, it seems. When I unfortunately destroyed my cell phone in a cup of water, I had to re-enter all my numbers as my replacement phone can't sync with my computer. I think I had over a hundred in the old one, and I only bothered entering 40 in the replacement. Accounting for multiple numbers, family members, and people I'd want Caller ID to tell me about before I answered, that leaves about ten people I actively talk to.

Time was, friends would call me all the time, I'd talk, I'd go out for the sake of going out, I'd do whatever. Now, I barely talk to anyone, and more often than not, I stay at home when I'm not working, or on weekends. I don't feel like driving everyone everywhere, I don't feel like spending money on amusements, I don't feel like I need to have people around that I can't trust 100%, like I would with my select few "best" friends. I don't know if I've grown out of something, or if I need to grow out of something.

I need to go to bed.

(DB) out.