need more room to shout...

So I don't know why I chose that title for my entry. I was suffering from iPod ADD and decided to commit to a Lostprophets album. So I just typed the first lyric I heard. I guess that means I do know why I chose this title for my entry.

I promised a real update, and by god, I'll deliver. In some fashion or another. The past couple weeks have been a lot of the same shit, much of it taking place over several different days. Boy drama, parent drama, money drama. Sadly enough, I don't dread going to work, and I enjoy being there. At this rate I figure I'm about three years away from a mid-life crisis. I'm not even twenty yet.

Tonight's been one of my nights in. I've been out the last couple nights, not being too wild or crazy or anything, but today is one of the first days in awhile where I come home from work, eat like a fat girl, then watch TV until I get bored with it. It's the lazy gay man's bubble bath, Ben & Jerry's, and good cry over a Lifetime movie. Which isn't to say that I don't enjoy bubble baths. Or Ben & Jerry's.

Ever watch documentaries, and find yourself filled with warmth whenever the characters end up doing alright? It's like, you can finally let out that bated breath, when that white-on-black screen doesn't come right before the credits. It's a ballsy filmmaker that will make a real nail-biter out of some poor person's journeys through an especially shitty part of their lives, and then have the black screen, talking about the lack of a real happy ending. Despite on-screen appearances. "Little Johnny, despite winning his fight with cancer, was run over by a truck while walking his many adorable puppies."

Fucking filmmakers.

Although the documentaries I treated myself to this evening weren't like that at all. Camera crews followed four transgender college students around for a year. I've been catching the series piece by piece, usually only on nights like this, when I've got the TV to myself and no particular reason to wake up super-early. But tonight, I got to watch the last four episodes all at once, up to the conclusion. One of the four students had a less-than-glorious ending. Which are pretty good odds for a documentary, I guess. Not so bad considering that he (FTM) was from Cyprus and had to go back after school was done. Cyprus = not the most socially liberal of climes. Then, really, seeing that one coming shouldn't have taken any special insight.

I don't know just what it is, but I feel like every time it rolls over 3:00am, I start getting sleepy. And right now, my eyes are having quite the time staying open. And they're watering. So I think I'm going to bed.

BTW, if you don't know about Fox Pass, check my Myspace. Follow the butterfly.

(DB) out.